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85scenes

@85scenes

Reviews of lots of bad movies, and a few good ones. From summer blockbusters to boring Academy Awards movies; I watch this crap so you don't have to

85scenes.com/
Joined August 2021
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❤︎⁠ (@hackerchick) profile picture
❤︎⁠@hackerchickOct 21
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❤︎⁠ (@hackerchick) profile picture❤︎⁠@hackerchickOct 21
Replying to @hackerchick
Tom Cruise playing an actor (who is Tom Cruise) playing a character (who is also Tom Cruise) based on a real person in-universe (who is also also Tom Cruise),
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I gotta see this shit wtf
ro (@hodvkavich) profile picturero@hodvkavichOct 16
whalefall reviews are either ‘i’m so sad i’ve been crying for hours’ or ‘that got me so horny i gotta jerk off’ what tf am i going to watch??
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that loud crashing boom you just heard was me landing in seat G10 for the matinee FYI don't be alarmed.
evan :) (@EvanSteinbache3) profile pictureevan :)@EvanSteinbache3Oct 16
if you take a shot for every ass shot they have in this, you’d die of alcohol poisoning
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The Domino’s online tracker 4 minutes after you put your order in:
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Hahaha you fools 85scenes.com/2026/06/27/the-…
The Superman Problem

The Superman Problem

I complain about Superman and why a movie about him is super unlikely to work.

85scenes.com
85scenes (@85scenes) profile picture85scenes@85scenesJun 27
Hey what's everyone's appetite for a 20+ page thesis on Superman and why he's a fucking problem? I weave in Supergirl shit if it helps. Ignore this post if you want me to hit publish, hit like if you think I'm a cinematic fraud
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I don't gamble, but my money is on "oh no"
Cinema Carve (@Cinema_Cravezz) profile pictureCinema Carve
@Cinema_CravezzSep 27
THE BATMAN PART II is reportedly targeting a runtime of more than 3 hours and 30 minutes, which would make it one of the longest superhero movies ever released.
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Image from Cinema Carve (@Cinema_Cravezz)
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Someone is binging my reviews and I see the views ticking up. Stop it. Who are you. This is scary. Identify yourself.
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I did my best not to be a film snob while talking about Zach Cregger's excellent "Resident Evil" 85scenes.com/?p=2660
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Guys. Robin Hood will Return. In Avengers: Doomsday. You heard it here first. 85scenes.com/2026/09/18/the-…
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The C in AMC stands for coca cola FYI
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Today I am watching Disclosure Day at the AMC theaters.
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I did this. I didn't find it. I did this. On accident.
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Today I am watching The End of Oak Street at the AMC
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to be clear, I made this mess 5 seconds after finding my seat.
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I am on a mission to eat as much popcorn as I can before the movie starts. It's what a real man would do
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I spent 45 overstimulated minutes in a thrift shop, didn't find anything, and then on my way out, a One Wish Willow caught my eye. Take it to the counter. I have exactly $11, the cost of the thing, in my wallet. What the fuck.
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I thought you guys should know that I had such a great idea for a short film that at nearly 4am I leapt out of bed and started writing. I need $2000, a single-story home, a dingy college dorm, 3 Indian actors, and a six-pack of diet coke. I'm winning an award for this shit.
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I have no idea what I was talking about anymore.
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so am I
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I had a few thoughts last night watching the previews before the new Spiderman movie while my phone was on airplane mode: They didn't do any makeup for Johnny Depp in that new Ebenezer movie he just looks like that now
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All the movies I saw trailers for before Spider-Man have the same exact theme: "useless"
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It's a little bit crazy that they're about to hit the 5th movie in the Jumanji franchise.
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