@2ToesUp
Joined August 2011
  • Tweets4.2K
  • Following332
  • Followers138K
578Media
Puppy kisses have healing powers
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Life update: Jack just asked me what the difference was between a getting a U-Haul and hiring movers
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Two. babies. There were two. Babies.
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Yesterday I had to take Chip to the vet. Vet: hi, I’m dr. Ogle. Me: hi, Ogle.
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Can someone at @WynnLasVegas NOT hang up on me? I’m on try three to get my credit card sorted. Help please
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You guys ever watch Hot Ones? You ever notice they include animations when the person being interviewed is especially boring and lame? The Sydney Sweeney one is essentially a 20 minute cartoon lol
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
The Sydney Sweeney interview mentioned contains a single animated clip that lasts approximately 9 seconds. youtu.be/a9ZhleGV4Qc?si…
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I think if more of us called this platform by its actual name “X”, more people would recognize that the platform we once knew as Twitter is dead. I kinda hate X and what it stands for so I have a blue sky account if anyone wants to follow me over there. bsky.app/profile/2toesup.bsk…
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Saying hi to Checkers
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Got a 4th dog! Say hello to Checkers
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Pretty frightened about project 2025 becoming my reality, so please excuse me while I go rock back and forth in the corner
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Chipwich just asked me if I ever go to my own house or I just hang around hers because I love her so much 😒
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The only reason I still do the wordle is because it helps me gauge how psychic I’m going to be that day
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Imagine lying in a job interview and the interviewer was like “actually what you just said is factually incorrect” and you were like “YOU PROMISED I COULD SAY ANYTHING I WANTED” and like they would still hire you jfc
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Jack has lived in the SF valley for 14 years. After admitting he didn’t know where Tarzana was,he just asked me if the SF valley is considered “the west side”
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.@jacksfilms billion dollar idea: My Size ReactBot
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Listen I saw chimp crazy and I don’t think it worked because I kinda want a chimp now
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One of my favorite things about dogs is how they wear name tags like it’s their first day of kindergarten
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Ok @NYTGames this is BS
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Can’t get the beetlejuice theme out of my head. That Danny elfman dude should look into making music full time!
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Ok who are the people actually playing the games on Netflix and are we all missing out
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As a person with a cowlick right in the front of my hairline I just want all you girlies with bangs to know how lucky you are
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