1. Say "Eye" 2. Spell the word "Map" 3. Say "Ness" RT if you get it..

I blame movies for my high expectations in relationships..

That annoying moment when your friend is a friend with the person you hate..

Retweet this with your tongue. (95% of people can not do this!)..

Mom: Can I see your twitter? Me: Whats that? *clears internet history, throws laptop against wall, flees to Mexico, changes name*..

I wish there was a room where we could go and find all the stuff we once lost..

Am i the only one who thinks water has that taste that no one can describe??

Friend: "Can you do me a favor?" Me: "Sure?" Friend: "Can you go upstairs and-" Me: "No."..

I could be a morning person...if morning happened around noon..

My room may be a mess, but I know where EVERYTHING is..

Airplanes have now banned tweezers. I think anyone who can hijack a plane with tweezers deserves the plane..

2,800 teenage girls get pregnant everyday. Retweet if you like pancakes..

Hardest job ever. Working in a bubble wrap factory. Imagine the self control needed..

I'm pretty sure that if Walt Disney watched Disney Channel today, he would cry..

Stop telling God how big your problems are and start telling your problems how big your God is..!

BROKEN CONDOM STYLE!!! Ayyyyyyyyyy that’s your baby! Nope! Nope! Nope! Nope! Nope!!!

Only Smart People Will Get This: 2 2= Fish, 3 3= Eight, 7 7= Triangle, 4 4 = Arrow, 8 8 = Butterfly. Retweet if you get it!!

Unicorns are real, they are just fat and we call them rhinos..