GIS Developer, Huddersfield Town fan, figure skater, fantasy art (acrylics and pencil),fly fishing, Magic The Gathering, gaming.

Huddersfield
Joined April 2008
Simon Earnshaw 🇺🇦 retweeted
The video for my poem “An Ode to Huddersfield”. Produced by Jack Masterson. Backing track provided by Brighouse & Rastrick band. A special thank you to ⁦@htafc⁩ and the other local businesses involved! #spokenword #poetry #huddersfield
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Simon Earnshaw 🇺🇦 retweeted
Occasionally, just when I think the world cannot get any more fucking ridiculous, I see something like this and realise just how wrong I was.
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Simon Earnshaw 🇺🇦 retweeted
Let us make them famous. These two allegedly are the thugs that who set light to a £100,000 bus, which was completely destroyed. Cc @WestYorksPolice
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well done #htafc - showed some right fight and bottle to lose that 0-4 against a team who are all but on their summer hols. 👌🏼
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Why do they always do the market research AFTER they have done logos/adverts etc !? 🤯🤷🏼‍♂️ #TheApprentice
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A turd performance by manager and players today. Rudoni totally off it. Why is Matos not playing ?! 🤷🏼‍♂️ Sorba lost his head in an important match. #htafc #rufc
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Ahhh thats what the Sorba dance is all about! #htafc What a player!! UTT 🤩 🔵⚪️🔵
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Ref - how that is not a straight red, god only knows. One of the worst refs I have seen in a long time.
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Simon Earnshaw 🇺🇦 retweeted
Replying to @historyinmemes
The Great East Japan earthquake rocked Japan violently for almost 6 minutes. It resulted in over 18,000 dead, including several thousand victims who were never recovered.
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Was literally driving to Town match tonight, and parked up, then turned back and drove home. I just couldn’t bear even walking to the stadium nevermind watching the 1st minute of this team. Seems like I made a good ultimately. Its all just very sad. #htafc @KevinNagleMLS
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Renegade was awesome
Today, I'm writing about two great brawlers for the ZX Spectrum: Renegade and Target: Renegade. Which do you prefer? Both are the work of Mike Lamb with Ronnie Fowles (Renegade) and Dawn Drake (Target: Renegade) on visual duties. #zxdreams #crashmagazine #retrogaming
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worse ever keeping ever!
You can’t go around head-butting peoples feet like that
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Simon Earnshaw 🇺🇦 retweeted
You can’t go around head-butting peoples feet like that
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Why do #McDonalds have air conditioning on in Winter in the UK! Turn it off for christ sake my foods going cold before I even have chance to eat it. @McDonaldsUK @McDonalds @McDonaldsCorp
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Simon Earnshaw 🇺🇦 retweeted
Scrum is a cancer. I've been writing software for 25 years, and nothing renders a software team useless like Scrum does. Some anecdotes: 1. They tried to convince me that Poker is a planning tool, not a game. 2. If you want to be more efficient, you must add process, not remove it. They had us attending the "ceremonies," a fancy name for a buttload of meetings: stand-ups, groomings, planning, retrospectives, and Scrum of Scrums. We spent more time talking than doing. 3. We prohibited laptops in meetings. We had to stand. We passed a ball around to keep everyone paying attention. 4. We spent more time estimating story points than writing software. Story points measure complexity, not time, but we had to decide how many story points fit in a sprint. 5. I had to use t-shirt sizes to estimate software. 6. We measured how much it cost to deliver one story point and then wrote contracts where clients paid for a package of "500 story points." 7. Management lost it when they found that 500 story points in one project weren't the same as 500 story points on another project. We had many meetings to fix this. 8. Imagine having a manager, a scrum master, a product owner, and a tech lead. You had to answer to all of them and none simultaneously. 9. We paid people who told us whether we were "burning down points" fast enough. Weren't story points about complexity instead of time? Never mind. I believe in Agile, but this ain't agile. We brought professional Scrum trainers. We paid people from our team to get certified. We tried Scrum this way and that other way. We spent years doing it. The result was always the same: It didn't work. Scrum is a cancer that will eat your development team. Scrum is not for developers; it's another tool for managers to feel they are in control. But the best about Scrum are those who look you in the eye and tell you: "If it doesn't work for you, you are doing it wrong. Scrum is anything that works for your team." Sure it is.
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Simon Earnshaw 🇺🇦 retweeted
🚨 BREAKING NEWS 🚨 Post Malone has purchased the Magic the Gathering “The One Ring” trading card for $2,600,000. This is the most expensive MTG card of all-time, crushing the previous record of $800k.
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Simon Earnshaw 🇺🇦 retweeted
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