My spirit animal is the gummy bear – at Cairns, Queensland

Mental note for next x-ray: dress warm, be hydrated, think mildly erotic thoughts beforehand and during

And, just like that, I have a ute load to take to the dump

People think that being tall is a life filled with easily reaching things, never getting lost in a crowd, being attractive by default, and a generalised advantage over the ants. I'll never know what shower sex is like, though, and it must be good because it's a cultural trope.

Mark your calendars: September 7th 2027 will be our first anniversay, as @SottileRusso and I are now fetlife official! ti amo Bella Pasticciona. mein herzblatt 🥰. ma licœurne 🦄

She just called me "mein herzblatt". I'm totally swooned. 🦄

The GPU shortage hit hard today, with @GeminiApp clearly running on CPU only, lowest difficulty, all sliders left, potato low++ mod, disconnected from information sources. Also Android Auto was suddenly Gemini instead of Assistant this morning so that fucks every drive now.

One of history's greatest town planning blunders is that 69 Swallow Road, White Rock is in an industrial area so, even if I bought it, it could never be my home address. Literally no point getting mail

Everyone's always going on about agoraphobia being bad, but it's March 2nd and today I filled my car's fuel tank for only the second time since mid-December. I can use the savings to go out on the town and party! Oh, wait. Shit.

I don't think I should have taken those 2 caffeine pills, 8 hours ago. I'm trying to sleep and I just thought of an old conversation, and a more elegant way I could have explained some tech. Between a Microsoft customer and I, in 1999. It wasn't even a bad conversation.

Vet told me not to let Mudflap exercise or get excited for the next month. Might as well have told me to levitate her with my mind every 10 minutes, whilst counting backwards from infinity, saying each number in a different language.

1 year ago, today, I was called a "dilf" for the first time. You never forget your first.

They just played "Needle and the damage done" at this wake and now I'm sad for two reasons

QOTD, @YalnGiri, when I told her my first-born daughter would be named Grogu: "fuck you on a dead dog" She has such colourful attacks locked and loaded, like a Rotterdam dockworker.

QOTD, Yalngiri, explaining a craving for seafood: "I don't even like seafood, I just eat it because it tastes so good"

QOTD, Yaln-girri: "some people are like tofu - they absorb flavour but they've got none of their own"